Investigative Report - Dating Scammers - How They Work and How You Can Avoid Them

Dating scammers know exactly how to capitalize on human weakness, where to find their "marks" and how to make your fantasies into their paydays. Here's how

Regardless of the dating or matching, or even which Social Media website you choose, you will undoubtedly run into dating scammers. They are present even on the most legitimate websites that make every-possible effort to screen and eliminate them. Their only goal is to find new "marks"-people who are anxious to establish a relationship. Once they target you, they will be patient, careful and appear to be looking for precisely what you are. Don't be fooled. The only thing they are seeking is your money and they have a seemingly-unending repertoire of ways to get it.

How scammers work...

Dating scammers primarily target older people between 40 and 65 years of age. Your profile on the website tells them everything they need to know to target you, especially if you are anxious for a relationship, that you prefer younger people, that you are in to fantasies and that you are probably financially stable.

In a great many cases, the scammers post a profile that states that they are in the same area you are. They will also post photos of some extremely-attractive person that isn't them at all. However, you can't know that, so they will use photos that appeal to typical fantasies. More often than not, these photos are 'plucked' from the Internet without the owner's knowledge. On highly-explicit websites, they are often copied from X-rated videos or promotional materials. That's all it takes for a scammer to set the stage for the upcoming con-if you bite.

Tip: if you right click on the photo, you can "select search for image on the Internet". You can search to see if the pics are used elsewhere.

The next step in the scammer's master plan is to get you off the dating/social media website and onto an Instant Messenger. More often than not, they will be using a Google/Yahoo IM so you may get talked into downloading that system. Once you're there, it begins. Expect a continuing series of IM chats during which you will be amazed at just how much you and the scammer have in common, or how much they are looking for a person with your qualities. How do they  know? Simple! The more detailed your dating/social media website profile was, the more they know. It doesn't take a 180 IQ to figure out the rest.

As things progress, you will receive much evidence that suggests how much they care for you. They will comment about how honest and open they are, extol their belief in God and being a good person, etc. They may even tell you she is in love with you and how desperately they want to be with you.

Now for the 'hook'....

Now that it's clear that you've taken the bait, it's time for them to set the hook. There may be a sudden medical/critical emergency in her family or perhaps she is overdue on her Internet ISP bill and is upset because they may be unable to contact you. They knows that's the last thing you want and that it's likely you will offer to help. If you do, they will want the money only by a cash transfer, not a check or credit card that you can place a stop payment on. And if you send it, she will be eternally grateful. Once you've gone this far, you have established yourself as a patsy and are totally hooked. They have your money and you don't really know who you are actually chatting with or what they look like.

The next step in your ongoing Internet love affair will be getting them over here to be with you. If you offer to pay their one-way air fare, the scammer  will make it quite plain that they would  prefer you to wire the cash so they can buy their own ticket. There are numerous excuses you can be given for this. The reality is that they want to be able to have your cash, which if they are overseas, can be as much as several thousand dollars. If you are foolish enough to go for this scam, I guarantee that you will never see your money again and you will most assuredly never see them!

This may seem like a dramatic portrayal that will never happen to you. Wrong! When I began the research for this article, I set myself up purposely as a typical 'patsy' , invested $150 in help for his Internet bill but absolutely refused to send anything but a prepaid, non-refundable ticket for the air fare, and refused to send any money at all. As I anticipated, I was accused of mistrust and never heard from the guy again, in one case. In another case, he persisted with the guilt attempts and kept asking for money, but I refused, but he persisted with endless messages of love, admiration and fear for his life unless I sent him money quickly! Be prepared, they will hit you with a lot of guilt, using your words against you, etc. It's overwhelming and surprising but you can clearly see their pattern and "goal of money", if you take a step back and look at your conversations logically!

No surprise there at all

They will work very! hard to take advantage of your good nature, but stand firm and please do not send any money! Remember, if the person is really in a desperate situation, they can go to local authorities and use public resources. It is not your job nor your duty to "save this person", that you do not really know.

How to avoid being scammed...

The first rule you should follow if you are hell-bent on using a dating/matching website is to limit your interests to people within 50 or 60 miles of your home. In this way, if a real connection is in the offing, it will happen. Make that a MUST statement in your profile under "what you are looking for." Be cautious with Social Media, also, they are active there as well!

Second, Never-and I mean never-get involved with someone overseas, especially in Ghana, Nigeria or anywhere in Africa. These are almost always scams, particularly if their dating website profile claimed they were close to you and in this country. This is just the first in a series of lies you will be subject to. Want proof? Merely type "dating scammers Ghana" into your browser and review the many website that list scammers and the stories from people they have scammed. That will convince anyone.

Third, while it isn't a guarantee, you'll be far better off if you can have a real-time webcam chat with each other. This is hard to fake, but can be attempted/done. And if the person you see doesn't look like the person's website profile photo, run for your life! Be cautious here too, though! They sometimes they will use videos of the person that they found online. If they are on a video chat with you but not interacting with you and answering your questions, they might just be showing you an old video. Or, they may say that they had a "bad connection" and could not hear you. I had one that I figured out was showing previously recorded videos by finding the same videos of this person on YouTube! Make sure that you can interact with them by video, be smart, they are out to get your money it's "their job"!

Fourth, they may be pushy about getting your photos as well. Be careful, some scammers do this in order to use your "every day" pics of people to scam other people because they know that these pics cannot be searched for nor found online by the other future victim/target. Remember, this is their livelihood and it can make them a lot of "easy money".

On last thing, never send someone money or give them your credit card info, bank account information or any other financial data. Ditto for passwords and user names.

Finally, don't be a chump. The odds that some outrageously-beautiful person is going to develop a relationship interest with a person 20-40 years their senior, or with someone whom they have not met in person, are about equal to or greater than winning the Mega Millions Lottery. Impossible? No! Unlikely? Absolutely. The odds show that these are either scammers or hookers and you don't need either one.

And don't allow yourself to be 'in love with the idea of being in love'. This requires real people who know each other and takes time to develop. Anything less is most likely just a pipe dream for a person who wants to recapture that feeling of love! There is no need to give up hope but please be safe and smart about the process! Good luck and best wishes!